Paul's Empty Messages
by Naruto Ninja44
Summary: Who knew that sending a voicemail could be so violent and humerous at the same time? Ikarishipping drabble/one-shot. PaulxDawn, PADL, ShinHika.


**NN44: Oh my, what have I done now…?**

**Blaze: Another stupid fic?**

**NN44: Ima bored, so lets get going!8D**

**Disclaimer: Naruto Ninja44 doesn't own Poke'mon or any of the characters for that matter.(And anything else you think she took it from…SHE DIDN'T!)**

**NN44: Dattebayo!**

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Paul fumbled with the cordless phone; he pressed the receiver to his ear as he listened to the numbers dial. His date went off without a hitch and now…he had to call her. He knew it was inevitable, he knew she would ask, he knew…wait, shouldn't he be talking on the phone now…?

Paul gulped nervously, his hand shaking as he started speaking, "Uh…Hey Dawn I-"

_"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!"_ Dawn's playful tune always got Paul impatient; he knew how her voicemail worked. And it was very handy; he actually has used it so many times that he can listen to his message to see if it sounded right!

Of course it wasn't that Paul wasn't grateful either, it would've been harder for him to talk to her in person on the phone. He had always liked Dawn, of course his cold personality and shadowy eyes gave him the reputation as an emo or goth. But Dawn looked at him unprejudiced and gave him the benefit of the doubt and actually agreed to go out with him. Last night was their third date, and to tell you the truth…he has actually become light hearted and less cold and apathetic.

Paul smiled slightly, gathering his courage he said, "Hey Dawn! I really enjoyed our date last night! You seemed to have tons of fun too, and I was wondering. Since we went out on 3 different dates now…would you be my boyfriend! I mean-girlfriend! I mean-AUGH!" Pressing the end button, he aggressively threw his phone in the direction of the couch, but missed completely and the phone soared right into the window.

Forgot to mention, not only did Paul have anger issues, but he had the worst aim, but a good arm.

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"Um…thanks for fixing the window on such short notice." Paul said, chuckling sheepishly, "My parents would've killed me."

The heavy-set man in front of Paul gave the lavender haired boy a gruff look, and without a word he held out his hand for his payment.

"Oh, yeah." Paul dug his hand into his grey, cargo pants pulling out 200 Poke'dollars and handing it to the man, "Uh…here. Thanks again for this."

The man grunted with a quick nod and waddled his way out the door towards his repair truck. The sound of him driving out indicated that Paul could try again with the message.

Paul quickly retrieved the cordless phone and dialed in the cell phone number messily, he held the receiver to his ear, _"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!" _Paul sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration waiting for the tune to stop playing.

"Hey there Dawn! It's Paul, and I must say you looked like a hot stripper-oh I shouldn't say that to you." Paul then jabbed his finger into the end button once more and heaved is frustration once more, putting his hands behind his head.

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_"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!" _

"Hi Dawn, you looked fantabulous last night! Oh that sounded soooo gay." Paul then jammed the phone back onto the cradle with a crack.

Paul glanced at the phone, a deep crevice going up the side of the black phone with an additional plus of sparks streaming out of it. Paul moaned in exasperation, and then collided his head into the wall for a few minutes.

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Now holding a new black phone, Paul dialed the numbers once again to hear: _"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!" _

Paul glared at the phone then started, "Yo my home skillet, Dawn-oh God no."

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_"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!"_

"Hey Dawn I had an awesome time last night! Of course every night is awesome with you! I just wanted to ask you…if you'd marry-I mean be my boyfriend-I mean I'll be your girlfriend! I mean-lets eat hash browns- AW screw this!" Paul then chucked the phone out of his open window (he learned his lesson from the first call), and heard it split into pieces on the tar street.

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Now holding his brothers cell phone, Paul awaited for the rings to finish and get to the voicemail but instead got: _We're sorry, the number you have dialed is unavailable at this time. Please hang up and try again. _

The lavender haired boy scoffed and chucked his older brothers phone at the wall, then instead of picking up the broken pieces, he stomped on them while swearing a stream of words under his breath.

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"Okay, maybe _my_ phone can call her." Paul stated as he dialed the numbers.

_We're sorry for the inconvenience; if you like to redial please press one. _

"No, I wanna talk to Dawn." Paul sneered to himself as he listened. There was usually a connect-to-the-person-you-were-calling button.

_If you would like to get the operator, please press 3. _

Paul scowled at the ground as he waited for the tone he wanted.

_If you would like peanut butter in your fruit salad, please press 6. _

"What is up with Dawn's phone…?" Paul thought as he threw a wild look listening to the recorded women on the other end.

_If you do not want peanut butter in your fruit salad, please press 8. _

Paul sighed once more, wondering how he got to this situation.

_If you would like to reach: _Dawn Hikari…

"Finally." Paul smirked as he listened for the number.

_…Please press 11. _

Paul nodded, "Okay eleven-THERE IS NO ELEVEN!" And with that Paul threw the poor defenseless phone at a poor defenseless door.

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_"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!"_

"Oi, Dawn, I wanted to say, that YOUR VOICEMAIL IS GHEY!" Paul yelled into the –new- cordless phone then ending it.

Paul smiled at his accomplishment, he knew Dawn would never get it, but it felt good to yell at inanimate objects. They're much better than dogs. Those bite when you yell at them.

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_If you would like to call: _Dawn Hikari _please press 11._

"FOR THE LAST FRICKIN' TIME, THERE. IS. NO. ELEVEN!!!!!!!!!" Paul was really getting a kick out of yelling at things today.

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_"Hello, this is Dawn Hikari's Voice mail! If you wanna leave a message, just say then press the green button on your phone! If you messed up, then just close the phone, and dial again! Well it'll be nice to hear your voice! Bye-Bye!"_

"Hey Dawn, last night was the bomb. You really looked good and I was wondering if you wanted to be my girlfriend! You know, because you're really sweet and much less of a bitch than all the other girls in our school…did I just call you a bitch in a friendly way? Uhg." He then groaned as he tossed the phone to the couch.

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Paul gave up; he tried at least 15 times and could not deliver a friendly phone call. Maybe he did have a too cold personality and just couldn't complement without any insults. Or maybe he just was a total loser. Whatever the reason, he was glad Dawn had that specific voicemail thing installed.

His cell phone rang, its familiar ring tone of a heavy metal song shook the house as Paul stumbled off of the couch to find his demented phone.

Quickly finding it on the kitchen table and flipping over the top he swore to himself he is changing the ring tone of his phone after this call. He gulped and waited a brief moment then a familiar voice came on.

"Paul? Hey Paul its Dawn!" The bubbly voice of the blue haired girl chirped to Paul's ears.

Still recovering from the ring tones attack Paul squinted his eyes for a second and answered, "Hello?"

"Hey Paulie!" Dawn squealed, using Paul's hated nickname, "I just wanted you to know, that last night was the best time I've ever had on a date!"

"Wait…date?" Paul thought for a second then snapped back into reality, he quickly stood up from his kneeling position, shook his head and replied, "Y-Yeah! I had an awesome time too! Can I uh, ask you a question?" Paul gulped trying to find the words.

He could feel Dawn smiling to him on the other end, "Of course you can Paulie! I'll always try to answer my best!" She then ended with her trademark giggle.

Paul smiled slightly, "Well, last night was our 3rd date-"

"And I loved it." Dawn interrupted still grinning widely.

"Heheh, yeah, I know, I was wondering, well. Will you be my girlfriend?" Paul then held his breath and clenched the phone much tighter, he thought it would break.

He could hear Dawn taking a deep breath, like the ones in those movies. The ones that get ready to reject you. Then she answered.

"Paul, I-I don't…um…" Paul smiled at this, she was nervous about it as well. He wasn't alone, "I, um…y-yeah! Yes Paul! I'll be your girlfriend, buuuut on one condition." Her voice taunted, he could feel there was a catch to this.

"W-What…?" Paul asked, gulping, (he obviously has never had a girlfriend before).

Dawn giggled playfully, "You have to be my boyfriend."

Paul glared, "You're an airhead. Of course I would be if you're my girlfriend!"

Dawn was now erupting in a fit of giggles, "Well _boyfriend_ where are you gonna take me out on another date?"

Paul blinked, he hadn't thought of that punch. He had to think quickly, fast like a cheetah, or cheetos, he could never tell them apart, "Um…the…_Casa Grande_…?" He mentally slapped himself, not only was that the most expensive place, but hardest to get into.

"REALLY!? Aw, thank you soooo much Paulie! When are we going!?" He could tell the girl was jumping up and down at the moment in excitement. Every girl in town wanted to go to _Casa Grande._

"Um…next Saturday at 7:00 PM!" Paul lied, now he had to get the reservation too, maybe his dad could pull some strings for him.

Dawn screamed in a high pitched voice that made Paul's ears wanna bleed, "THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU! I love you Paulie! See you then! Bye!" And then a beep.

Paul dropped the phone to his side, a confidant smile reached across his face. That wasn't so bad, now he just had to get a nice suit, reservations at the most hard to get into place in town, and a limo.

Compared to what he's been through all day, that'll be a piece of pie, or cake, he could never get those right either.

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**NN44: Well that was fun.**

**Blaze: Please press eleven to make a call. **

**NN44: Remember: I you have, Reviews, marriage proposals, love notes, retraining orders, death notes, death threats, or any thing else that falls under this category, press the review button!**

**Blaze: Or you can just press 11! **

**NN44: DATTEBAYO!**


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